*sigh* Just one of those times when you suddenly jolt out of a 'fairytale' mode. You know, the kind of mode you get into when everything 'seems' perfect, when you're really not seeing the entire picture. If you choose to hide in some fairy book mindset away in a corner, singing away and hoping that what's going on behind you doesn't exist, you're only going to make things worse. You're avoiding the question, and putting off answering it until tomorrow. Well...it's still going to be there, and if you're homeschooled like me, you're going to end up with double the work - double the questions to answer on a paper. After all, tomorrow is really today, if that makes any sense.
Suffering, pain, the kinds of things that twist your heart until it sinks...they're real, and no amount of wishing is going to wish them away. And unless it's what God says is the right way of it, a few fervent Hail Marys aren't going to whisk these realities away either. God doesn't take them away like that. There's a short prayer that I found today. It goes something like: "Dear God, I know that nothing will happen to me today that You won't help me overcome." It's the short version of one of my favorite prayers:
"My God, I do not know what will happen to me todayI only know that nothing will happen to me That was not forseen by You And directed to my greater good for all eternity. This is enough for me. I adore Your eternal and unfathomable designs. I submit to them with all my heart for love of You. I offer the sacrifice of my whole being to You, And join my sacrifice to that of Jesus, my divine Savior. In His name and by His infinite merits, ask you for patience in my sufferings and perfect submission, So that everything You want or permit to happen Will result in Your greater glory And my sanctification. Amen." There's something about a God not making problems vanish. It makes seem God far away and...not exactly someone to confide in. There's something about God taking our hand and walking through our problems WITH us. It means God's closer than we think.
One of the beautiful things about the mysterious thing called life...one moment it can be a gale with a powerful force enough to knock rip trees from the earth, then next it's a delicate rose petal...fading away into the ground to nurture the sapling that would grow beside it.
Blah, Cy-Cy is probably babbling at this point. Goodnight, invisible internet friends! Until next time when Cy is crazy enough to stay up and actually post something. :) She doesn't exactly know why she's even posting it.
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